Nobody thinks about divorce as they’re getting ready to walk down the aisle and say, “I Do”, but unfortunately this is becoming a recurring theme in couples where one of them is actively serving in the military and serving multiple deployments at that. It seems as though longer and more frequent deployments are happening to the post 9/11 generation of servicemen(women). If you think about it, 12-18 month deployments that continuously happen back-to-back are bound to take their toll on a marriage. After all, the military’s creed is “God, Country, Family” in that order. With marriage having to take a backseat to the citizens of the United States, it can really hurt no matter how mentally prepared you think you are to handle it. Let’s take a look at why this happens.
When you have to leave your partner behind as you go off to combat, they will miss you like crazy. Eventually being lonely kicks in. Especially, if your family had to move to a new base, and your partner has no new friends while you’re deployed. This can lead to depression and wanting to be back in a familiar place with a support system.
Not always but deployment can lead to your partner having an affair. There is the need to be with someone that is around more often and to feel wanted and desired. It must be difficult for a couple to crave intimacy, only to know that it’s not possible to have at the moment. No one serving wants to think about the possibility of their partner cheating on them back home, but it does happen.
Lack of Fulfillment
Did your partner have to give up a dream, goal or a career to support your military career with the constant moving from base to base and taking care of the home as you serve your deployment? This can take a toll on your partner as they may fill resentment towards your career and let their own dreams go by the wayside. Although, many couples should understand and know what they’re getting into, it’s hard to imagine your feelings until you’re actually living the situation.
Overtime, with the distance of deployment many people simply fall out of love. They feel they no longer know the person and they’re a stranger to them. It’s very much a relationship roller coaster of blissfully being together, then separate for extended periods of time, to being back together again. Eventually, the rubber band will lose its elasticity and pop.
Many soldiers suffer Post Traumatic Stress Disorder (PTSD) after coming back from combat. This can make bonding and rebuilding your relationship difficult. It may be too much for your partner to bare. Your partner may not be as supportive as you had hoped on your journey back home, and they may want out of the relationship. Unfortunately, the stress of PTSD can be challenging and difficult for all parties involved.
Stephen T. Holman, Senior Partner, and Justin T. Holman, Partner, are committed to providing the best legal service in Pensacola, Destin, Pace and Cantonment, FL in a variety of legal areas including Family Law and Personal Injury. We specialize in Fathers’ Rights and will be there every step of the way to fight for your rights. Our office is located at 1940 W. Saint Mary Avenue,